casino lugano facebook:casino,lugano,facebook,Only,ch:' Only chicken, every day with the differences of the man oh' 'Lily, I am sorry, I have no heart to harm you, you are always a goddess in my mind' Lily finally cried out, she hugged me, crying to the fence house Hear Xiaozhen is a high scho
' Only chicken, every day with the differences of the man oh' 'Lily, I am sorry, I have no heart to harm you, you are always a goddess in my mind' Lily finally cried out, she hugged me, crying to the fence house Hear
Xiaozhen is a high school graduating class student. She is a little fat and not tall, but her facial features are handsome, her hair is short, she wears a pair of glasses. She came to me one afternoon. Consultation.
Xiao Zhen didn’t smile at first, just looked at me blindly. I knew she was observing me and trying to read me with her own eyes.
At that moment, I can feel her alertness and her desire for self-protection is strong. After an interview, Xiaozhen began to trust me, and I slowly learned that Xiaozhen is a strange character, rarely interacts with people, and is in a state of boring and oppressive all day, and has a certain pessimistic and disgusting mood. She once said: 'In normal times, when I see that others are very happy and happy, my heart is uncomfortable. When others feel ridiculous, I don't feel happy at all! I often think: What is funny, laughing? 'How about?' She often sighed: 'What is the reason for people to live? Xiaozhen has a tortuous life experience. She lost her father at the age of four. Later her mother remarried. She was raised by her grandparents. My grandparents were very obedient to her, but to high school. When my grandparents retired and their homes were not as good as before, life began to exert certain pressure and could not be desired. She felt like a person abandoned by the world.
When I was in the first year of high school, I had a relationship with a boy in the third year of high school, but I was stopped by the teacher.
After several interviews, from Xiaozhen’s thoughts and behaviors, I also found that once her understanding of life is incompatible with the people around her, it is difficult to integrate into the public. She cannot actively and consciously adjust. Low emotions, analyze yourself to change yourself and integrate yourself into life.
This is just like a person who has sore throat, nasal congestion and other symptoms, but does not want to understand that he should go to see a doctor, let the condition worsen. We know that people are prone to illness when their immunity is reduced. In fact, there is a similarity between physiology and psychology. When a person's psychology is not protected, but they are under too much pressure, the potential 'pathogens' will 'explode' like a time bomb, making people feel uncomfortable. Nothing is done. Fro Yinde, the founder of the psychoanalytic school, believes that the occurrence of a person's psychological disorder is often the result of early seeding and rooting. So the early experience is the parasitic place of the so-called potential 'pathogens'. From Xiaozhen's early experience, it is not difficult to see the uncomfortable pressure brought by her unfortunate growth in her journey. This is the “pathogeny parasite”. Further analysis of Xiaozhen's psychology, I think Xiaozhen's heart has the following three aspects of 'pathogens': First, the indifference psychology we know that people with this kind of psychology lack of changes in their lives, will not be stimulated by the outside world It shows normal emotional reactions such as emotions and sorrows. When someone is happy and happy because of something, it may be a childish expression in Xiaozhen’s eyes, she can’t find happiness from life. It can be said that the pressure and frustration in life have accumulated a thick layer of ice in her heart, and even if the outside smile is brilliant, it will not melt the ice in her heart. Seriously, she may be numb to life, losing her love for life and her longing for the future. Second, the lonely psychology Xiaozhen lost his father at the age of four, and the mother remarried by his grandparents, this life is not normal compared with the experience of others' happiness, she experienced the unfairness of people, she feels like being abandoned Orphans, no one loves her. Therefore, they are eager to be loved and cared for. This may also be one of the reasons why she fell in love in high school. However, she felt that the whole life had deceived her. She felt that her fate was miserable. She worried that others would look down on her because she knew her. She also worried that others would use her unusual experience to hurt her. She tried to create a 'snail shell'. I hide myself, thus inexplicably closing my heart and not trusting others easily. This is a vague and strong 'grievance', and the 'grievance' is not caused by the honor and disgrace of some specific problems, nor because of some unhappy things that happen to her now, if you Asked why she has this kind of emotion, she often can not tell the specific reasons. This kind of 'grievance' is deeply ingrained in her heart. She does not want to admit it but can't control this emotion. It is because this psychological conflict creates an 'unbalance' that makes her both in thought and behavior. Others are incompatible with each other and cannot communicate with others to further develop a lonely emotional experience. Third, the inferiority psychologist Flom said that if there is a lack of communication between people, it often produces negative emotions such as loneliness and inferiority. When we discussed the problem of Xiaozhen's few people interacting with each other, she said: 'I don't have to be close to them. I don't like them anyway, they don't like me.' Later, she whispered a whisper, to know what to do with friends. It can be seen that Xiaozhen is repelling interpersonal relationships and she is afraid of socializing. Later, Xiaozhen told me: 'How can people like people so much, I will not work, or my mother will not want me, see me grow fat and short.' From this I found that Xiaozhen lacks self-identity. Not only is she afraid that others will look down on her because of her growing experience, but she also fears that others do not like her because of her appearance. These concerns make her feel that she is shorter than others. She can say that she also looks down on herself from the inside. It should be said that she did not have confidence that others would treat her well, so she took her own grief. I believe that the psychological status quo of the above three aspects of Xiaozhen is easy to make self-protection, self-escaped retreat mentality, resulting in her series of behaviors, such as consciously or unconsciously avoiding covering up her pain and depression. Emotions; unwilling to associate with others, reticent, subconsciously do not dare to communicate, but in front of others deliberately express not want to associate with them, disdain to communicate; use arrogant masks to cover up their inner fragility, let others think she is self-important; There is a lack of minimum self-confidence in life, and it is difficult to extricate yourself from the strange circle of communication. These all create a vicious circle that makes her feel that learning, work, and life are meaningless, and that sighs are thinner than paper. Another problem that cannot be ignored is that she was discovered and stopped by the teacher when she was in love. Xiaozhen’s evaluation of this is: This is an attempt that I am so bold and bold, but the feelings of this thing are not worth mentioning. It seems that Xiaozhen’s desire for love is still strong, but this emotional experience did not make her sunshine. On the contrary, this unpleasant experience made people around her lose confidence and lost confidence in themselves. We know that in the middle school stage, teachers are afraid that 'early love' will affect their children's learning, often 'love and change', thus forcibly stopping the child's 'early love' behavior. In fact, this panic and attitude towards children is earlier than The emotions themselves are more harmful, because it is normal to produce feelings, but if the normal things are concealed, the negative effects will follow. Obviously, her teacher's handling method is not appropriate, and it also brought some harm to Xiaozhen. Xiaozhen said this: 'I hate their self-righteousness.' After three interviews, I have a general understanding of Xiaozhen's psychological situation. As well as my analysis and diagnosis of Xiaozhen's psychology, I tried to start counseling from the following aspects: First, I have a positive recognition of Xiaozhen. Starting from the appearance of Xiaozhen, let Xiaozhen write a comment on his appearance. Among them, there are eight negative ones, for example, too fat, too short, myopia, yellow hair, etc. There are only two positive ones: white skin and eyes. Big. So I used the refutation method to present my new evaluation. After Xiaozhen was positively hinted by me, she was quite confused and kept saying, is it? Is it? During the fourth consultation, I found that Xiaozhen was shaken by my approval, but still lacked good self-identity. So she used mirror technology to let Xiaozhen re-examine and evaluate herself and record it every day. Record a good evaluation and strengthen her new evaluation. Secondly, let Xiaozhen learn positive self-suggestion. The inferiority complex stems from a psychologically negative self-suggestion and is a conviction that 'it is not as good as others.' Therefore, I believe that to prevent and overcome the inferiority complex, we must not only let Xiaozhen dare to face up to himself, affirm his own strengths, recognize his shortcomings, but also realize that no one is perfect, everyone has their own advantages and disadvantages, for some Unchangeable facts can be compensated for by the brilliance of others, and they are not self-defeating. So I instructed Xiaozhen to let her learn to encourage herself. If she said to herself before the exam, 'I have the ability to do well, don't worry, as long as I do it seriously, I will succeed.' Then I will continue to strengthen this during the exam. Implied, it will enhance self-confidence and overcome the negative impact of inferiority. This method reflects the difficulty of implementation. Because I have been thinking about negative conjectures, we further carried out self-confidence training. During this period, I used the advantages of bombing, shouting confidence, being able to speak and other psychological counseling activities. Xiaozhen began to produce certain psychological impedance, and after insisting on completion, there was very Good results, the tone and tone of the language have changed a lot, and occasionally there are positive languages. We joked that this stage is the ice age. Third, let Xiaozhen try to experience love and learn to love. First let Xiaozhen understand that love is broad, not only love between men and women is called love, and secondly, let Xiaozhen understand that behind the indifference is often the lack of love. Therefore, indifferent people need a kind of fraternity, a passion for life. Then let Xiaozhen understand that changing indifference does not require earth-shattering, but just know how to communicate from the small things around him. Then I let Xiaozhen begin to experience this kind of fraternity. For example, greet a loved one every day, give a smile to the classmates, look at the bright sunshine, and take a look at the green grass, and feel the enrichment and happiness brought by love and enthusiasm. Xiaozhen and I watched the behavior and performance of people's love at the corner of the street. I also suggested that Xiaozhen should try to feel the love of her grandparents from the nuances and try to express her love to them. Fourth, cultivate Xiaozhen's positive attitude. I try to let Xiaozhen understand that she should not be worried about past events or realities that cannot be changed. Experience is a kind of tempering. Those who are unfortunately unwilling to come out in the past are manifestations of cowardice. The fact is that facts cannot be changed, but people’s views and ideas can be updated. Look at the surroundings with new eyes. Your own opinion will also change. After so many months of getting along, Xiaozhen has been able to listen to what I said. I gave her three days to reflect and let her write a thought about 'past and present'. Xiaozhen mentions in the article. To: 'Looking for a psychological teacher is the second bold attempt of my life. With this attempt, I have the present, and what should I do now, but I am still confused?' The lines are still full of confusion about how to build a positive attitude. So I started to do partner therapy for Xiaozhen. I found a cheerful and optimistic girl from her class to actively interact with it. At the beginning, Xiaozhen always asked me what she should do. Later she said that girl. It is quite easy to get along with each other. In fact, people are often unconsciously influenced by others. Therefore, it is beneficial to the development of Xiaozhen’s positive attitude with some cheerful, optimistic and energetic people. After more than two months of psychological counseling and treatment, Xiaozhen appeared to be somewhat gregarious. In her own words: “I don’t seem to be a hedgehog any more.” Xiaozhen’s inner thoughts have changed a lot. Step by step out of his ward, it can be said that the 'pathogens' in Xiaozhen's heart have no room for survival. I was moved when I saw the change of Xiaozhen. Reprint please keep this link: ().
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